Howdy-ho, partners.
The house is dark, I've completed my essential Thursday-night television viewing, and am now sitting down to pen some thoughts- which will hopefully be coherent despite my tiredness and a determined baby pressing against my belly.
Have you ever felt vulnerable? Of course you have...it's part of the human condition, and a challenging reality when it comes to the spiritual dimension. Vulnerable, that is, to attacks from the devil himself. I figured out my open door to these attacks a while back, and still struggle with keeping that door closed.
It happens when I'm alone for too long. Don't get me wrong...I've never considered myself to be of the co-dependent sort. But I can very easily let my thoughts snowball until I'm a weepy, sobbing mess. And I know that I can consciously stop that from happening, but often choose not to let Jesus fight that battle for me. It's just easier surrendering to sorrow.
Add into that mix a slew of gestational hormones and, well, I can be quite a wreck.
Chris is away at a conference this week, so I decided to combat the lonely-heart blues by surrounding myself with lots of distractions. I went to Moorhead for a couple days to hang out with Chris' family, a visit that was long overdue. Then I picked up my good friend Karen from CA, who will be staying with me for a week. All of this to avoid the inevitable meltdown.
Most importantly, I'm walking with Jesus on a minute-by-minute basis, and reminding myself that I'm never really alone.
"And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." -Phil 4:7
3 comments:
So glad you and Karen get some quality time together! We are continuing to lift you up in prayer. Love you girl.
You are doing all the right things, surrounding yourself with activity and support. There is no need to battle sorrow, however. A good cry is our natural, God-given release for stress and sadness. Let the tears flow once in awhile with no regrets!
Jamie-
thank you so much for sharing this.
I can identify SO much, and it is so wonderful to hear you speak so openly and honestly.
ps forgive me for the random comment months later, I was catching up on all my blogs that I subscribed to :)
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