I've had an extraordinarily short fuse lately.
I know it has something to do with my altered sleep pattern lately, and I've been biting my lip so the whole household here doesn't feel my wrath.
So, I'm going to vent it out here. LUCKY YOU!
**If you are looking for a motivational post, you are in the wrong place!**
1. SOCKS that are TOO LOOSE. It's finally sweater/sock season here, and after going barefoot the past few months, I've been forced to put a layer over my ice-cold toes. Unfortunately, my socks all seemed to GROW since last winter. (Or, more logically, I was pregnant and had big feet that stretched them all out!) In any case, loose socks make me CRAZY. It's a day-ruiner, like uncooperative hair or baggy, tired eyes.
2. PRODUCE BAGS at the GROCERY STORE. I literally had tears in my eyes over this recently. When I cannot get the *%#$@ bag open, not only do I feel like the world's biggest idiot, but it's a huge time waster. I don't have time like that.
3. PLASTIC BAGS full of groceries. I am a paper bag girl, and I don't mind that I'm not "saving the environment". On a recent trip to the supermarket, they wrongly assumed I would want plastic bags for my cart FULL of groceries. Not only do they use a ridiculous number of plastic bags (here, let me give you a bag for every. single. item.) but their amoebic shape means their contents are going to be rolling around my trunk by the time I get home anyway.
4. POLITICAL CAMPAIGN ADS. Need I say more?
5. "NOOO, KOTTTA, NOOOOO!!!!" Sibling aggravation. Ahhh, it's just going to get worse from here. Carter is IN LOVE with his sister. Really, it's amazing...he's a magnet. She leaves the room, he's crawling in there. She looks his way, his face lights up. She has a toy, he wants to play with her. And while she loves her brother when she wants to love her brother, she does NOT love him when he's all up in her business- which is pretty much all the time now. "No Kotta! That's mine!! Noooo! Mommy, take baby over there??" (Mommy pounds forehead on keyboard.)
6. THE CLERK AT THE HALLMARK STORE who
threw my credit card at me today for no apparent reason. Now, I'm not one to punch old ladies but let me tell you...I almost became one today. It may be that the only reason I spared her is because I'm saving my first punch for the lady behind the B&N Starbucks counter, who has been on my list for quite some time. (No, I'm not threatening actual physical violence here.)
7. PEOPLE who are NOT DOING THEIR JOB. I stood in line behind five other people while one clerk was behind the counter working up a sweat, and another was wandering the front of the store like she was lost. Now, I have become much more brazen in my "old age". Either that, or my time is just much more valuable when I have other duties to attend to. So you better believe I chased down that comatose employee and "asked" her to lend a hand. Ugh. This doesn't bode well for a stress-free Christmas shopping season.
8. POOR GRAMMAR. I'm a former teacher. It's in my blood. And poor grammar has ALWAYS bothered me. But lately, I've seen a crazy influx of my EDUCATED FRIENDS using incorrect tenses, inappropriate punctuation and horrible spelling. We are in our thirties now, friends. Time to learn the difference between
your and you're.
9. SNAPS on BABY CLOTHES. They are enough to drive me to tears lately! (I'm telling you, my hormones are in a bunch.) Carter likes to play this game called "kick, twist and cry" when I have to snap him up. It's super fun. And, this scenario usually ends with having to redo them all anyway because I MISSED ONE %&$# SNAP.
I realize this post may make me sound like a horrible person.
All of these things are, of course, silliness in the grand scheme of things.
But seriously, folks....I'd be a happier person if you would just check your spelling and buy me some socks.
Feel free to add number 10 to my list...